Insanity by Inches

soo i felt that it was time to have a funny quotes post. not to mention that my page said it's been 3 weeks since I had a post.


Don't believe in you, believe in me who believes in you! - Gurren Lagan (the most epic anime ever... a 100 million light year tall mech that throws galaxies like throwing stars and can absorb the energy of a Big Bang... nuff said)

followed later by - "don't believe in me that believes in you, don't believe in you that believes in me, believe in you that believes in you!"

When your enemy is strong, stick your penis in coffee -  Me:  not quite sure what the context was.  I think i was making fun of sun tzu

What is a man?  a miserable pile of secrets! - castlevania, symphony of the night, said by dracula -  this is the original, but what it spawned was truly special.

                                          What is a dick?  Where do babies come from?  I'm confused! - Dracula on sex

                                                What is love?  baby don't hurt me - Dracula on love and bad songs



Anyway, enough of that

Life is stressful, i have two massive papers due soon, a test on thursday and I am currently in the middle of two research studies!  Gotta love school!

My computer died last night, it blue screened my ass and now i have discovered that the hard drive is fried.  I didn't lose any homework i was working on, but i did lose 53 gigs of music... most of which i don't own in cd format.  Yay me, until i can get it all back, i can't sync my ipod or i will lose all of the music on there too.  (for the record, my review of Muse's The Resistance Album will be coming up soon).

THIS IS SO LAME

Peace, i will go sulk in my room after this class is done.


oh yeah, the good news is now i will be getting a 600 gig partitioned harddrive!

Hah!  the comic store in Edmond closed because they didn't pay taxes!

( Long post, if you really want, enter if you dare )

So yesterday in order to celebrate independance day i decided to cook a large dinner for my friends who were in town and could come.  After smoking up the apartment with my first attempt, then switching skillets and making a few adjustments, I finally pulled it off, and I need a name for this recipie for when I put it in the cook book.  Amazing but Terribly Bad for You i don't think will work.

Essentially what it is, is a thinly stretched or beaten chicken breast, rolled up, stuffed with cheese, wrapped in bacon, grilled and than slathered in teriyaki sauce.  it makes a roll about 7 inches long, and it is chicken... wrapped in bacon, need I say more?

So... suggestions on a name?


I also find it funny that it is customary to play The 1812 overture on the 4th while the fireworks are going off.  Wrong war people!

So my political theory class midterm was last weekend.  It was a take home midterm, with only three lines detailing what we had to do.

1500 word max
10 point times new roman font
Contemporary American Application of Plato's Republic

Ok, so i automatically start thinking about what to do it on.  Naturally, being the massive geek I am, I choose Watchmen yet again.

but the reason for this post is not about the paper, it's about what my teacher said about papers.

He said, "When you write an essay for me, think of it as us going on a date.  Your introduction should be be eye-catching, attempting to capture my attention and make me want to see and experience more.  This is you getting out of the car and me seeing you (in date form) for the first time.  The body of your essay is supposed to amaze me with your knowledge of the readings and other information you pull out for this essay.  As usual, the body is what I would be focusing on the most on a date.  The conclusion is like a sweet kiss at the end of the date, it needs to have a sense of finality, proclaiming that the date is over, but also needs to leave me with questions of my own".

As much as I like Dean's "essays should be like a hooker's skirt:  short enough to make it interesting, but long enough to cover the topic", I prefer this analogy due to it being slightly more informative.

also, just finished reading 20 sections of Lao Tzu's Tau Teh Ching, and I am feeling slightly philosophical.

I want to write something, but i don't know what.  There is so much i can say, but i can't think of anything.

We are currently covering sex in psychopathology.  fun facts

the teacher said a couple minutes ago "and then there's premature ejaculation, and we are all familiar with that".  I don't think he thought that sentence through.  What he meant is that we all know what premature ejaculation means because we read it in the book so we wouldn't have to cover it.

Men of course think about sex more than women, but women have sex more often then men.  which is interesting considering that since the study was between heterosexual couples, women will be having sex just as often as men... because they need a partner.

I am hungry
I am going to go back to my apartment after class, eat and fall asleep.

Hopefully Victor brought back a better modem because ours is a piece of shit

It's really funny considering the food situation in the house, Alex's gf buys food for her and only her, and he assumes that I am the same way.  He is now asking if he can eat the cheese that i bought.

Hulk Vs. Thor has too much plot for a movie that is 45 min long.

the Big Book of Theories is coming together.

Maelstrom Nexus in MtG stacks, and that's funny.  I cast one spell, and get 4 more for free

It's interesting to see how far i have come in magic... i used to build decks for the express purpose of winning.  Now i build decks for the express purpose of pulling off something flashy and cool.  This has also changed my opinion on counterspells, before, a counter was just part of the game, now the counter is the one thing keeping me from being amazingly cool.

LFG is a hilarious webcomic.  Read it chumps.  "rejoice for bad things are about to happen"

I am leaving this weekend with toni to go up to michigan to see my step sister for her graduation.  Vic and Alex are leaving to go play SF4 in a tourny in chicago at nickel city arcade.  This of all weekends, is when Starky decides to come back and visit.


That's about it, later kids

So Ultimatum 4 came out yesterday with the final installment coming out next month and I thought for all of the maybe 1 of you who are interested in the ultimate universe, i would give you an update on the kill count.

Dead:

Dazzler - drowned because of tidal wave
Beast - drowned because of tidal wave and body thrown through building
Nightcrawler - drowned because of tidal wave:  found by wolverine
Syndicate - killed by William Stryker
Firestar - killed by Stryker's friends
Toad - killed by Stryker's friends
Most of the Mutant Students at the Xavier School - killed by Stryker's friends
Professor X  - neck snapped by Magneto
Multiple Man - Prime was owned by Wolverine
Lorelai - Taken out by Wolverine, K-Zar and Shanna
Giant Man - Blown up by Madrox (multiple man) suicide bombers
Captain Britain and MI13 - blown up with british parliment by Madrox suicide bombers
Thor - Stayed in Hel as an exchange for Valkerie's soul
Wasp - eaten by Blob:  Giant man made reference to the "jocasta project" which means that she will probably be turned into a cyborg
Blob - Head bit off by Giant Man
Juggernaut - Killed by Stryker's friends
Angel - Overkill on the part of Sabertooth
Dr. Strange - Killed by Dormamu, body collected by unknown figure
Spiderman - No body so probably not dead, but missing after Dr. Strange's house blew up
Psylock - Not on page, but it is assumed that she died during stryker's raid on the x-men compound
Daredevil - crushed by building caused by tidal wave

current raid on Magneto's fortress by cyclops, jean grey, wolverine, storm, iron man, captain america, valkerie (who cut off magneto's arm), and hawkeye

there is no way spidey can die, due to the fact that they have already announced that they are continuing the Ultimate Spiderman Title
and what is the point of ironman and wolverine trying to fight magneto?  i never understood that


anyway, the second part of this is that a couple weeks ago, spin city was on tv and i decided to watch one of the reruns because i enjoyed the show.  You would not believe the number of people in that show who were also in scrubs.  I think just about all the main characters, as well as some of the minor ones have had cameos in scrubs at one point in time.


fun stuff
later kids

it's been a couple days since anyone has posted anything that shows up on my friends page so i got bored and decided to post something.

here it goes, i told skal and alexa this one this weekend

Manipulation is part of daily life, in fact, it has become part of society.  Although it is frowned upon by society, everyone does it.  In many cases, people use their social status, or emotional status to get a response or fulfill a goal.  therefore, it is frowned upon but it is socially expected from individuals.  As an example, the guilt trip.  The guilt trip is using one's emotional standing in other people's lives to get what you want by making them feel bad.  I have done this before and i am sure that many of you have as well, but i am not judging, I am merely giving an example.

In class we covered in depth a disorder called Anti Social Personality Disorder.  This disorder is what most people we would classify as sociopaths exhibit.  One of the most recognizable symptoms of this disorder is something called Flattened Affect.  Flattened affect is the removal of the ability to feel emotions.  Now, the removal isn't complete, but in order to feel a specific emotion, the stimulation must be extreme.  Therefore, since it becomes an effort to feel emotions, they don't feel negative emotions because they do not put effort into feeling negative emotions, only positive.  Because of this, the are incredibly manipulative, and don't feel guilty about manipulating other people.

A theory that I developed states that this is not actually a disorder.  These people have become hyper or super adapted to modern society.  If it is socially accepted to manipulate people, then it would be beneficial to facilitate the manipulation of others.  By removing the feelings of negative emotions from the manipulator, they are no longer hesitant to use this action, due to the fact that they won't feel guilty afterwords.

A thought that seemed interesting at the time, and flips around definations of "what is a disorder".

I am getting sick and tired of my roommate alex and his girlfriend lori.  He decided, without asking us, that she was going to live in my apartment this summer.  He assured us that she would pay for groceries and rent while she lived here.  However it appears that those conditions were subject to her whim.  The only groceries that she has paid for are those which "only her and alex can eat", and I haven't heard anything about rent and am therefore assuming that she is paying half of his rent.

Ok here's what set me off this morning.  Appearently they wanted to grill outside today for memorial day.  Fine.  They told Vic like 4 times, but didn't mention it to me once.  Then this morning, alex comes out of his room and tells me that anyone is invited to come to the grill out, but they have to pay because it was "expensive".  Coming from alex, and seeing the food that they bought, this means two things.  One, total cost was roundabout 80 bucks, and two, lori paid for it.  And here I am, after putting on a Seder at my apartment for passover that cost somewhere around 200 bucks of my own money, that took two straight days of shopping and cooking, that I didn't ask for anything back except people to come and have a good time, and set me back financially so much that I had to withdraw from my savings to pull it off.  And they have the nerve to ask me to pay for their little 80 buck grill out?  This is so fucking stupid I can't even believe it.

Aside from that, there's the rent issue that has been constantly nagging at the back of my head.  Whenever Lori came to blono to visit alex, (which was often for weeks on end), she always was bitching about how her roommates had boyfriends who came over and didn't pay rent.  Well, I don't see her paying rent, and if she is paying only half of alex's rent, she is grossly underpaying.  Rent, per person, for my apartment is 341 a month.  This of course is paid by 4 people, which totals rent for the apartment to 1364 per month total.  If she is living in my apartment she should be paying a fair share of the rent which would then be 1/5 of the total, or 272.80. According to this, each of the members of my apartment is spending an extra 68.20 a month covering for her rent.  Therefore, each of us should be getting a check for 68.2 each month that she stays here.  If alex chooses not to charge her his share, that's his deal, but if she is going to be living in my place, that bitch better be paying me.  If she is only paying half of alex's rent than she is paying 170.50 a month, a good 100 bucks short of what she should be paying.  Not only is she underpaying, but it only benifits alex that she's here.  She's his girlfriend, so he would want to spend time with her (heaven knows why), she's paying for half of his groceries and half of his rent.  What about the rest of us, this apartment is in part mine as due to a lease, a legal contract, that means if anyone is staying here, i should be legally inclined to take 1/4 of the payment.

That and why the fuck can't we eat the food she buys?  It's not that special, maybe whenever I buy groceries for the entire apartment i should just keep them in the fridge in my room, and cook meals explicitly for me and toni when she comes and visits instead of for everyone in the apartment.  In fact, i have to literally ask alex for permission to eat food that might be his, and in turn he asks her!  I'm tired of this shit!

I am so pissed that I am close to snapping, one more word from her and I will make her life here a living hell.  I will bring the legal aspect of it down on her head, and that's something she doesn't even comprehend.  (in fact, if i did tell young america, they would probably strong arm her out for me because it violates the lease).

so i have mixed feelings about summer classes. I am sitting here in class with my laptop out, bored out of my skull.  That's the downside.  3 hours a day of the same class at 8 AM, for four days a week, for 4 months.

however, as i look around the classroom i see 30 other people throughout various walks of life.  There is a girl sitting to my right who is obviously a freshmen, and you wonder why a freshmen needs summer classes.  There is a woman on my 11 o'clock who seems to be in her mid to late 50s and one wonders why exactly she is here.  I think i learn more from the makeup of the class than the actual class itself.

This class is psychopathology, also called abnormal psychology, and for the last 3 days we have been covering stuff i have learned already.  Behaviorism, psychoanalysis, rorshach inkblot tests, TATs, everything that i know incredibly well.  However I am looking forward to one debate that we will appearantly be having about whether or not PMS should be considered a psych disorder

this is just some random shit i have been recalling, reading, thinking about, etc before summer classes start on monday.

1.  The last page of Suicide Kings limited series starring deadpool had one of my favorite things about comics in it.  It shows deadpool with both of his arms cut off and daredevil, who had just saved him from the punisher, crouching in the window.  Deadpool says "you know you wanna say it", followed by daredevil saying "i thought you could use a hand".  Violence and bad puns, the most amazing combination ever.

2.  Vic has this cool theory about patriotism.  If one looks at the root of patriotism, it is pride.  Pride is a evolutionary necessity.  A mother who takes pride in her offspring will try harder to keep them alive.  One who takes pride in their appearence will try harder to pass those attributes on to their offspring.  Therefore, pride in one's country is the desire to keep it safe, which in turn keeps you safe.  Therefore, patriotism is evolutionary necessity.

3.  I used to make fun of music where all the singer does is scream all day.  Now I am reevaluating it because of the technical aspects that are involved.



that's about it for now, aside from the usual "i'm happy because i am actually getting to spend time with Toni", thing.

I don't even know what to say.

This is like a strange sense of deja vous.  i am asking myself the same questions now as i did near the end of freshmen year.  Near the end of that year, my great aunt on my mother's side, Joan, passed away.  Strangely, I felt nothing.  I constantly questioned myself over whether feeling nothing was a good thing or a bad thing and came to no real meaningful conclusion.

Now I am going through the same thing once more.  I have looked at people's posts on facebook and lj and compared my reactions to them.  When i found out Trent died a couple days ago, what was the first thing that I said?  "Weird".  that's all it was to me.  I mean, i knew the guy, i would have considered myself his friend, and i had fun little ideas of putting money over who whould win in a fight, him or chief.  But "weird" was all it was to me, and I am sure that some people will see my point.  Having Trent die is along the same wavelength as going to the wedding of someone I know.  It seems just weird that it's happening to people in my age group.  And yes, that means people in my age group getting married is weird, but to someone who is in college, where none of his friends were married before, his friends getting married is weird.

Trent's death had little emotional connection to me.  All it was was an anomalie, something that offset the grind and made me think for a few minutes.  Once again I sit here and ask the same questions that I did with Joan.  "Is this OK?"  Is it ok to sit back and feel nothing when it comes to the death of a friend, or of family.  This is the first time that I am taking my time to think about this instead of brushing the thought off... and this is all i can come up with.

I hear about Trent's death and i give it a passing thought, then go back to my own problems with my internet, my apartment, my summer classes, and dealing with the arrogent bitch that is my roommate's girlfriend (but that's a story for a later time).  If people are pissed at me for saying this because trent was a close friend, than grow up.  I don't want sympathy, i don't want answers, all i wanted to do was get my thoughts out of my head and onto paper (so to speak).

So... tired... must... use... shatner... voice...

Ok now that that's out of the way.

I pose a question.  If someone who has multiple personality disorder plays hangman with themselves, can they be accused of cheating?


I spent 3 hours doing the stats final project last night.  my god it sucked.
the only thing i have left until finals is my captain america paper which will be kicking my ass this weekend.

for all you gamers, twilight emperium is amazing and you should come over to my apartment sometime to play

i have had the strange urge recently to play settlers of catan.  I don't know why.  the prospect of starting up my "sheep cartel" is just too funny.

My god i am tired, none of my shit is coming together in any coherent order.  I will go to class, then to sleep

So once again I approach the end of the semester and am completely swamped by homework.  You would think with all of the shit I already have to do, the teachers would lay off on the busy work but nooooooooo time to load up on the stats homework.

As of now, here is the list
Research Apprenticeship stuff that I have to finish today
English Portfolio, namely, all of the shit i have ever done in that class, revised with all my other drafts and peer reviews, due next tuesday
5 page paper on the government of Alan Garcia in Peru, due next tuesday
10 page Stats final project, due next thursday
20 page Captain America Paper, Due two weeks from yesterday

Yay me.  Now to some people this doesn't seem like a lot of work.  Well it is.... considering that the portfolio is pretty much 6 papers.  God the final weeks suck.
hopefully, after tuesday shit will calm down, and i only need to focus on my stats project and my captain america paper.  That and I only have 2 actual finals

Moving on.  The classes themselves are easy.  Watching movies in two of them, day of the locust yesterday in pol of the image, Ojos que no ven or some shit like that in peruvian politics all this week, and possibly V for Vendetta in pol of the image next week.  English is over next tuesday when i turn in my portfolio and today is probably an in class work day.

Other news.  I have been elected President of the Student Psychology Association for next year.  The entire process was hilarious.  My roommate alex ran against me and I won, then he ran for vice, and won than my roommate Victor ran for treasurer and won.  So out of the 7 officer positions for next semester, my friends and I control 3.  If only Alex Stark was a member, than i am sure we could control 4.

I am also auditioning for a DJ position at ISU's radio station tomorrow at around 2:30.  If i get it, I will be hosting a regular pop section a couple times a week, and than the biggie, the 3 hour Mosh Pit metal station once a week.  If i get it, I will post the website where you can listen to me on here.

I need coffee, and loud angry music.  For the last two nights i have had some severe issues getting to sleep.  I will lay in bed and toss and turn until 4 in the morning.  No wonder I am tired when I have to get up at 8.  Fucking papers and stats classes.  A factorial ANOVA, the bane of my existence kept me up late as hell last night.  three pages of equations concluded in a simple, "reject" or "fail to reject" the null hypothesis one liner at the very end.  I could have just guessed and had a 50% chance of getting it right.

I really need to go home and take a nap, but I am here at the library putting the final touches on a 5 page informative paper I had to finish for class today.

One big question... why does everything need to be cited?  This process stifles creative thinking.  Someone always has to do it first and it doesn't leave any room open for creative original theories.  I love my Politics teacher for this.  I can come up with any theories I want about Captain America for this one paper, and if it's original, i don't have to cite jack shit.

Speaking of theories, I hammered out something that has been flying around the apartment for quite a while and although it is kinda weird to think about and not really appropriate to talk about in public, i find it highly entertaining.

So the question that was proposed to me yesterday at work goes as follows.  If you have two lesbians, who have never had sex with a man, and only with each other, are they considered virgins?

Well, this reminded me of a conversation I had with Kurtis while I was introducing him to Heroes, in this conversation, the question went something along the lines of, since Claire can heal, is she perpetually technically considered a virgin because her hymen will always repair itself afterwords.

Yes, I know, we are sick disturbed people, but what the heck, why not tackle the subject.  The conclusion that we came to is that a hymen does not necessarily need to be broken by a penis in order to be broken.  Many cases occur every year where trauma to the pelvis causes it or even hell, a dildo?  Even so, what is the physical difference between a guy who is a virgin and a guy who is not?  no difference whatsoever.

So anyway, this leads to the very important conclusion that virginity is not a physical thing at all.  (very important in police SOP, due to the fact that that's the first thing they look at to determine if someone is a virgin or not).  So therefore, virginity is a social construct and a matter of perception instead of a physical issue.

What this is all boiling down to is the very 19th century notion that there is no overarching truth, all truth is in perception, we are not just looking out at what we take for granted is true.  Therefore, if someone perceives something as sex, then it is truly sex to them.  So the two girls who have never had sex with a man are in fact not virgins, because they perceive what they are doing as sex, and since the physical perception of a virgin is now void, who is there to stop them?

Ah well, back to the grind, glad you read my little theory



Witz Out,

Incredibly tired and sick.  I was tossing and turning in discomfort and not being able to breathe until about 3 last night and I had to get up at 8 to go to the library to input shit into spss.


Fuck this noise, I am skipping class the rest of the day to go to sleep and if I feel better by tonight I will go work out.

god this sucks, it was better yesterday and just hit me in the face this morning.

The good news is that I am all registered for next year except for my research apprenticeship.  And I have a class with my favorite teacher in ISU

I cannot express just how much I hate life at the moment.  I have been working on this paper for my latin american politics class recently.  It's a 3000 word paper, that i decided to spread over 3 days.  in my mind, 3000 words at around 300 words a page, averages out to around 10 pages.

at about 12:30 last night, i hit 3000 words and realized just how much I had left to go.  Come 2:30, I was up to 13 pages.  Fml.

oh yeah, and people don't seem to understand just how much i needed to work on this shit.  Endless bothering and pestering from Vic and Koitus to either play brawl or watch a show.  Even with my door shut, i get the annoying brawl chant.  It's kinda like the seagulls in finding nemo but now it's just "brawl?  Brawl???"

so not only am I tired, but I have to use my only break between class which i could nap in, to do homework for other classes.  Homework which is also due today.

Luckily things will calm down for about two days before I have a shitload more work to do.  Between subjects ANOVA's are a real bitch to do in SPSS, let alone by hand.  I have to do some work on my captain america paper at some point in time, and i have a shitload of coding to do starting friday for my research apprenticeship.  English classes are of course as distasteful as anything and always load me down with papers.

So yeah... on a positive note, I finally grabbed the newest Trivium album from the library and it fucking rocks.  It is a very solid album and I will probably end up buying it sometime soon.

anything else comes up and i will post

So I just heard the most genius theory ever.

ok, a bit of a background first.  My political theory teacher, Dr. Shapiro, is a fountain of knowledge.  The man knows about everything.  It doesn't matter what we are talking about, he knows more about it than anyone else I know.   The man beat me in movie knowledge!  Me!

anyway, our grade for that class is split into three things.  There's a paper and presentation, class participation, and finally a 20 page paper that is practically a masters thesis.  Since this class is called Politics of the Image, we are dealing in images, or a set of images.  True to my fanboy nature, I chose Captain America as my image and appropriately named my paper "Politicizing the Captain:  70 years of Manipulating Captain America".  I met with Dr. Shapiro today to discuss my paper proposal, which I gave to him before break.  The discussion was very informative and eventually we were talking about Captain America's uniform and more importantly, his shield.  Why does he have a shield instead of something a little more conventional?  The short answer is that it looks cool.  Then Dr. Shapiro got that smile that he gets when he thinks of something amazing, and said two words.  "Monroe Doctorine".

The theory works like this.  Cap's shield is an inherently defensive instrument.  The monroe doctorine is the declaration that the United States is the protector of western hemisphere.  Cap. uses his shield in an offensive manner, where the monroe doctorine is also used offensively as an implied threat.  Therefore, The shield is a symbol of american foreign policy.

Well that was my nerdgasm for the day.

Moving on.  I have decided that college makes me a nerd and a geek, and here's why.

Highschool - Nerdy or geeky things that I did, or have done, etc.
Marching Band
Drama
Orchestra
Magic the Gathering

College - Nerdy or geeky things that I do etc
Marching Band
Magic the Gathering
D&D
Call of Cthulu
Warhammer
Red Dragon Inn
Twilight Imperium
Theater of Ted
4-Square Marathon
Brawl Tournaments
Suck Movie Saturday
Wierd Wednesday
Collect Comics
Knowing endless trivia about and quotes from games and random anime clips (see title for latter)


So yeah, I have become much more nerdy since college started

I hate it when something is hyped up and then fails miserably.  for the last month, Marvel has been hyping up Manifest Destiny:  Nightcrawler as the x-men comic where Nightcrawler, one of my favorite X-men, leaves.

I read it yesterday.  and was highly disappointed.  Jesus... if you say someone is going to leave, have them leave.  Don't have them leave for all but the last two pages and then have them come back.

damn it Marvel